A Philosophical Journey To Sex

Harry, a character in the 1989 movie 'When Harry Met Sally', tells his partner Sally, "Men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way." The movie tells the story of these two who knew each other for years and are very good friends but always fear that sex would ruin their beautiful friendship. Earlier, James Joyce, a twentieth writer and literary critic, said something about love and sex which became an eternal quote: Love between man and man is impossible because there must not be sexual intercourse and friendship between man and woman is impossible because there must be sexual intercourse.

With some rare exceptions, these two analogies fit all human relations with the opposite sex. You might have heard about 'platonic love' in which sexual desire is either non-existent or is suppressed but this type of love is limited to fiction and literature, it doesn't happen in human life. Hermits, monks and yogis are being touted for suppressing sexual desire and following the rule of 'Brahmacharya'. 

However, for every man, this is something beyond imagination or practice. 'Sex' or 'copulation' has taken centre stage in their lives. Sex has become a secret, a taboo, a necessity, a product, a desire and a nature at times.  

Many young men and women live with a burning desire to have sex with the opposite sex. Shiva Prakash's maiden novel 'Samabhok' is an insight into the desire and effort that a man puts into getting a girl to quench his sexual hunger. 

The novel has Ishu as a central character who comes across three women – Subi, Mugdha and Sindhuka. These three women are not only the characters in the novel but the turning points in the life of Ishu, so in the story as well. 

You have read or heard stories of Nepalis who reach new countries in search of jobs or pursue higher studies and have told tales to tell about their secret or open 'sexual life' abroad. Many Nepali young men return home empty-handed from Malaysia and gulf countries, where they spend most of their incomes on girls, mostly Filipinos. Sex is a need, a fundamental biological need, for every man and woman entering into their adulthood. 

This is what Shiva wants to portray in his novel. The story of the book is philosophically divided into three parts: Book, Bhog and Sambhog (ravenousness, consumption, copulation). The first part deals with the hunger for sex. A young man follows, stalks and pampers a girl to fulfil his physical desire in the hope of having an opportunity for sex but the hunger of women is different, she exhibits indifference to the invitations, signals and demands by the man. She rather uses the man to fulfil her other desires like shopping and outing. 

It is another fact that many women find shopping more satisfying than sex! To satisfy his sexual hunger, Ishu is forced to fulfil many other pangs of hunger for the woman which he desires. 

There are three turning points in the life of a Nepali young man living in the United States of America with the entry of three women at different intervals. 

He has a wife at home in Nepal and unlike his friends shies away from going to night bars, massage centres or sex workers. He follows a woman who lives with her husband. Readers get thrilled every time he and the husband come face to face. No wonder, many young people living away from their homes and family would find their story in the novel. 

Subi entertains herself in hunger while Mugdha enjoys her hunger, and Sindhuka thinks copulation is above hunger and consumption. Sex for her is the way to find the supreme soul. 

The writer has presented the philosophy of life – hunger is the mother of all inventions (which might be adapted from the original proverb 'necessity is the mother of invention'). 

And this hunger could be for food, shopping, travelling, dressing, and of course, sex. A character in the novel tells that sex is the by-product of the body – children don't feel it, youth can't live without it and old people live having sweet memories of it. On the other hand, love is nonsense – it does not have flavour, colour and face. But another character says that love and god are the same because both don't have their physical existence but could be felt by the heart. The writer says that the world so far has survived because of the three - ravenousness, consumption, and copulation. 

Meanwhile, some readers might feel uncomfortable by the easygoing nature of Mugdha who is different from other women who have jealousy stuffed in them and die of envying other women. However, this jealousy in women as presented in the book might be a stereotype of them. But male characters also envy their friends but they say it bluntly on their faces. 

Shiva has resorted to a new style of writing; at times it reminds the readers of 'Taruni Kheti' - a novel by Saru Bhakta that figuratively tells a story of sex. 'Samabhok' follows the same path. At times, the reader may find it like another version of pulp fiction, too. But the book soon takes a philosophical course and surprises the readers at intervals. This book forces you to contemplate human relations between a young or adult man and a woman which are developed around sexual motives at least from either side. This is an entirely new and different world for Nepali readers. 

Short and quick sentences and simple dialogues have not only made the book readable but also impactful. It's not an easy task to treat such a complex issue with such simple and rhythmic language. 

Shiva uses everyday language to tell the complex philosophy of sex, an issue which is not discussed openly in society, not even in schools and colleges. 

If you want to change your taste in reading and consume something new in literature, this book is for you.